Harrison: Valentine’s Day not a celebration for everyone

Valentine’s Day is often presented as a celebration of romance flowers, cards, and grand gestures of love. Valentine’s Day has both a sweet and a not-so-sweet side, and acknowledging both is important for our mental health.

The sweet side of Valentine’s Day is about connection. Feeling cared for, valued and supported, whether by a partner, a friend, family or community has real benefits for emotional wellbeing. In West Carleton, those moments of connection are often simple: a walk through Fitzroy Harbour Provincial Park, coffee at Alice’s with a friend in Carp, or a friendly conversation at the Carp Farmers’ Market. These everyday gestures matter.

The not-so-sweet side is that Valentine’s Day can also highlight loneliness, grief and loss. For those grieving the death of a loved one; navigating a breakup; facing uncertainty; or feeling disconnected within a relationship, the day can feel heavy. Even people who generally feel well may notice a sense of comparison or pressure when faced with idealized images of love.

It’s important to remember that Valentine’s Day does not have to be romantic to be meaningful, and mental health is not measured by relationship status.

Caring for mental health on Valentine’s Day can look like many things: practicing self-care without guilt; choosing rest over obligation; reaching out to a friend; or showing kindness to someone else who may be struggling. Small, thoughtful gestures toward ourselves and others can be just as powerful as traditional Valentine’s celebrations.

Rather than asking what Valentine’s Day should look like, it may be kinder to ask, ‘what would support my wellbeing today?’ The answer may change year to year, especially during times of grief or transition.

By making room for both the sweet and the not-so-sweet sides of Valentine’s Day, we allow the day to be less about expectation and more about compassion, connection and care. Be kind to yourself and others.

Christine Harrison is a registered psychotherapist, founder and clinical director of Focus Forward Therapy Group, and a dedicated community leader with more than 15 years of experience serving West Carleton. She previously held a leadership role in mental health programming at the Western Ottawa Community Resource Centre (WOCRC) and currently serves as a director with Carp Health Access, where she works to bridge clinical care with grassroots support. Through her work, Christine has championed accessible, evidence-based therapy and advocated for holistic wellness across rural communities. A committed volunteer, healthcare innovator, and proud mom of three, Christine is passionate about building stronger, more resilient communities through collaboration, compassion, and forward-thinking care.

To read all Christine Harrison’s columns, click here.